Offering Luminaries A Place to Cultivate
Enjoy A Little Peace & Ease
While on Your Journey to Become
Who You are Meant to Be....
The feeling for freedom is a one of my strongest desires. Which is why it is odd that today sitting here on the edge of the very change I desire; with excitement, fear and wonder surging through my body, I choose avoidance. Instead of diving into the new thinking, I have done just about everything else with my Sunday. I have cleaned under my kitchen sink, brushed the dog, cut up veggies for the week, shopped online, looked at my linked in site, ate gummy worms, sent friend requests to people I think are old college classmates. It appears I am much to busy to start my online course- right?
To be honest I started my class yesterday. I made it through two modules and scared the hell out of myself. I found it way to easy to do the homework. Have I been prepared for something new for awhile now? Strange how the fear of good things can be almost crippling.
If I had a “problem” to solve or issue to address you could not have pulled me away from the computer until I was done. Even right now the dryer just buzzed and the call of folding my bath linens is more appealing than starting the first real step toward living with more freedom.
If you are reading this blog, as you continue your quest for deep and lasting change, I imagine you can relate. As managers we are -all in- fixing the problems of the day, getting the work done and waving off our need for food, water or personal comfort. We are full speed ahead— In contrast, given the prospect of finding balance, joy and fulfillment we feel unsettled.
The dream of true freedom and change for me has always been squarely placed in my near future. For years continuing to move this dream out ahead of where I stand, dismissing the slight tug of my freedom undercurrent.
Doing the class lessons yesterday- I stumbled across tons of excuses. Building a long mental lists of reasons that I don’t need more success. I have already achieved more than I need. I am fine because I have more than most. Go fold laundry--
In the past, day dreaming when it never felt possible was fun, like a mental vacation. Now, on the edge of possibility I reach for anything to stay in my comfort. Even with that said, I have been around long enough to recall that each time I throw myself off the comfortable cliff, I spread my wings and fly.
Grand Design: In this place I sit today, thinking about the potential for change— this fear must mean that I have tapped into a one of my Divine life plans. I have all the support I need. I remember that I don’t need to know it all now, I can start the first step and trust.
Ritual of Me: I will move through this fear, and all its twists and turns, honoring the potential to use my gifts for the —good of me. I deserve my best efforts too.
In what ways have you denied your core values due to fear of positive change? What have you done to move forward anyway? I would love to hear your thoughts.
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